Tuesday, 22 September 2009

  • For those of you wondering, and I doubt many of you do, I first became a scientist a long time ago.  You see, scientism is not an occupation, but a way of life, a manner of thinking.  I was trained from birth to be a scientist:  taught how to think, how to formulate a question based, how to observe my environ.  There was always something new to explore, whether it was auto mechanics, the neighborhood, or the application of a hacksaw blade upon my brother's bike lock.  The 'who, what, where, when, how' of the world as I knew it. 

    But then came the question 'why.'  And it is not so much the 'why' of the 'what, where, when, and how' that brings me trouble, but the 'why' of the 'who.'  Because the rest of those are measureable, repeatable, and in other ways imperical.  It is the 'why' of the 'who' that takes me into something that is science and is not science all at once:  metaphysics.  Because it is measurable, repeatable, and completely observable... but at the same time, who can predict the outcome of any two 'whos' at the same instant?  And who can actually say they have observed another?  Isn't it just speculation based upon outward reactions on the physical environment? 

    Many scientists believe that the human mind can be quantified by the sum of its parts.  But what they don't realize is that the sum of its parts are being quantified by the human mind.  It is a paradox.  Quite possibly the largest of the ages:  is thought a product of the environment or is the environment a product of thought?

    I know where I stand.  Where stand you?

Wednesday, 19 August 2009

  • Clothes Dryers:  Simple matter of warm circulating air or diabolical offspring of the Large Hadron Collider (LHC)?

    As a matter of course, most people believe that a clothes drying heats air through an electrical or gas element while using a tumbling action to circulate the clothes through that warmed air.  I submit this is not the case.  In fact, each clothes dryer is nothing less than a core of densely packed subatomic particles as a result of byproducts from the LHC. 

    Now, you may contest that the LHC only recently came into being.  I believe that the French government has been hiding this device since before World War I, and is the reason Germany invaded France twice in attempts to harness the power for complete world domination.  I can't think of any other reason to invade France, can you?

    But without proof this is all conjecture.  First, any densely packed mass will have a higher gravity field than the objects around it, attracting them to itself.  This is why the washing machine is constantly moving toward the dryer.  Repair men blame this on unbalanced loads.  It is not so.  Furthermore, gravity more quickly acts upon smaller objects, drawing them to itself as they have less mass.  This is why socks and handkerchiefs disappear in the dryer:  they are actually sucked into the nuclei of the other cells.  Other smaller articles of clothing such as loose knit sweaters and tee shirts lose mass through this process as well, they are large enough to not be sucked into the gravity field, but some atoms are pulled away from the weak gravity of the shirt, causing shrinkage.  A reaction like this would release heat as the atoms began collapsing upon themselves:  the reason your clothes are warm when they come out of the dryer.

Saturday, 01 August 2009

  • "So you made your one effort to live a normal, selfish life and the universe immediately smacked you down. Because we're wired to find meaning in semi-random events:  you decided to never be that careless again." - Gregory House

Friday, 03 July 2009

  • Ah, the laboratory has been quiet for a while:  as quiet as it ever gets.  Some things are buzzing on this burner, catching fire on that one, HCl spilling all over my freshly waxed tile floor...  such is life in the lab.  And somewhere in the midst of the smoke and haze a loud, but friendly horn sounds and the vapor hood begins to remove toxins from the air as I attempt to make it to the door before the peroxide bottle springs a leak.

Friday, 29 May 2009

  • The day Harrison's Yellow bloomed is a day I can never forget. 
    I woke to hear a faint voice say,
    but what it said I don't know,
    though the meaning came through clear. 
    My family would never be quite the same.

Fast facts